I feel like I am a time-bomb/bowling ball all rolled into one. There is so much that I want to still do in life. There is so much I want to see. And yet I am overwhelmed withe exciting possibility of seeing my son. How I long to hold him and begin our life together. BUT, I also want to have people over next Friday. I want Jakub and I to enjoy a small vacation free from the stress of the black cloud of PhD. How can I want to something to come so bad and at the same time think of so many other things to do?
My belly is huge. Gigantic!! It would be nice to feel like a single person again. No, I still plan on remaining married. Single as in not two at once. I love feeling Mateusz move and kick. But how wonderful would it be to feel him really move. Dress him up in adorable outfits. Feel his mouth sucking on my breasts, knowing that I am nurturing him the best way I know how. I would also like my belly to shrink so that it will stop stretching! The skin will finally shrink and I can inspect the damage…the damage of those damn stretch marks have made on my “beautiful” belly!