Thursday night was a whole night of contractions. 20 min, 15 min apart, and the excitement building with each one. We were out at the movies, and I couldnt wait for it to end and the night to end, and the morning to come, and my son to arrive. Jakub and I went home via the bus. Waiting in the night, bouncing on the bus the contractions died. They faded. We came home, cut up pineapple, did the prime rose oil, and I crossed my fingers that they would come back.

Friday I woke. Jakub asked me “how was your nigh?” I stared at the ceiling and a little tear rolled down my cheek. Fine. I slept fine. “Don’t ask Jakub.” The sun was shinning and I was still pregnant with my little son. We got dressed and went to our 41 week tests- ultra sound and stress test. Routine, the one on Wednesday was normal. What could change in 50 hours?

Off we went to the hospital. Grabbed a hot chocolate at the corner store. Traffic was fine. We found a parking spot and went in to register. In the test he moved and for about 30 minutes we looked at his heart, his arms, measured his skull, nothing important. We made small talk with the technician. She made a small comment that the fluid looked a little low. But she didnt seem concerned or say much.

Jakub and I returned to the waiting room and we waited to get the results. Within ten minutes and the technician come back and said we could the stress test at the hospital instead of going to the office in Fresh Pond. We were delighted that we didnt need to do the drive. (There more short stories about how we felt and saw things, but I am just writing the basics).

Up we go to do the stress test. We were not registered at the hospital so Jakub went down to take care of the paperwork and I got set up for the test. I sat there reading my book listening to my Mateusz’s heartbeat- lub dub, lub dub, lub dub. Suddenly I didnt heart it so strong, but I thought the monitor was in the wrong place. The midwife came by and asked me to shift position. She asked if  second midwife could come in. I thought something might be wrong, but it was surreal so I didnt worry. The second midwife and they listened. They asked me to move to my other side, and then again. A moment later two doctors come in. They start examining me. Jakub comes and he is in the back. They put an oxygen mask on me and suddenly I start to panic. I am trying to stay clam. The midwife said, your baby’s heart beat has dropped twice and I think it is time for your son to come.

The doctors are starting to move. A nurse comes and tries to put an IV in me. She can’t find my vein and I watch the blood coming out of my arm spilling onto the floor. They try my other arm. The midwife starts to take off my jeans to see if I am dilated, another doctor turns to her and says “There isnt time” Another nurse is talking to me and is asking me health questions, allergies, medical history, I am trying to answer, while fighting tears and trying to joke to take off the edge. A doctor turns to me and says “I have prepared you for a section.” I nod and ask I can’t try labor. The midwife says “your baby’s heart has dropped twice from 130 beats to 60 beats. He is not happy and he needs to come out. He is communicating with us and saying he is not happy in there. ” I nod, and say “no amount of pitocin will save m now, lets go with it.” The nurse and doctors start to move. The tears are starting to come, but I am trying to be calm and make jokes to relieve the tension I feel. The midwife comes to me and talks to me. Everyone introduces themselves and are so nice. I ask the midwife, is my fluid low because I didnt ask. She rubs my and and says no, it is not your fault. The baby is coming.

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